Succeeding While Black – 5 Ways to Avoid Altercations with the Police

By Matthew R. Drayton

During the past few months, there has been numerous incidents— some tragic—where police officers were accused of brutality and abuse of power against African Americans, including Ferguson, South Carolina and New York being the most well-known. Some of the incidents were caught on video. There are nearly 780,000 sworn officers in the United States protecting and serving 319 million Americans. Police officers have a very difficult and stressful job, but that is no excuse to use excessive force. However, we must take into account what these officers go through and understand that all police officers aren’t bad.

I have been in situations where I could have easily gotten into confrontations with police officers. Years ago, I regularly worked with local and state police officers in major cities throughout the U.S. I can tell you first hand that there are some police officers that are prejudiced or egotistical, and some that have their own agendas. I remember arriving in Texas to meet and work with local police there. When I reached out to shake one of the officer’s hands, he refused! Later during that same trip, I was almost arrested because the same police officer who wouldn’t shake my hand, failed to tell a group of his fellow officers who I was as I approached them.

On another trip to California, a police officer stood two feet in front of me and stared me down while I waited to meet with the Deputy Police Chief. I had never met this officer before, nor did I do anything to him to warrant the stare he was giving me. In both Texas and California, I was the only African American in the group; my co-workers were not subjected to the same treatment. In both cases, I had no choice but to work through whatever issues those police officers had with me. I did not respond to their behavior towards me, and worked more closely with the officers who reached out to me than the ones who didn’t. In the end, we successfully finished our work in both cities, and I made some new friends in law enforcement.

My experiences with the police were not all bad; in fact there were more positive experiences with them than negative ones. I realize some of my circumstances and encounters with the police were of a different nature than being pulled over for a routine traffic stop, but the two situations I mentioned above were intense and could have easily become confrontational. I have been stopped and pulled over by the police numerous times over the years, and I can honestly say, I have never been mistreated by a police officer. The following 5 tips have worked for me when I have had encounters with police officers in the past. Hopefully they can help you too.

(1) Obey the law: If you are breaking the law in any way; it’s only a matter of time before you have to deal with the police. Turn on your flashers, drive slowly and pull over to a well lit busy area if you are pulled over. Cooperate if you are being questioned or arrested to avoid any physical confrontation.

(2) Be polite and show respect: Greeting and treating a police officer with respect immediately de-escalates the situation. Regardless of how you feel about being pulled over or questioned, the police are authorized to do so. Mouthing off and becoming aggressive towards the police will make the situation worse.

(3) Obey police officer orders: When a policeman asks you to do something reasonable, do it. Remember, these men and women are trying to do a job, and sometimes need to gather facts to do their job. Disobeying the police officer’s orders will again only make the situation worse.

(4) Make lifestyle changes: Most of the things that happen to us are a result of our decisions. Alcohol, outdated license plates, and erratic driving are a few contributors to police stops. If you are hanging out late at night with known offenders, or in places where there is a high probability of a crime, there will likely be a heavy police presence there.

(5) Educate your children: Teach your children at an early age about police brutality, and to be respectful when dealing with the police, and all adults for that matter.  Explain current events to them in an unbiased way, and make them aware of the dangers they face if they break the law, and what can happen to them at the hands of some police officers.

It is not my intent to downplay police brutality incidents or to be insensitive to anyone who has suffered or died at the hands of the police. My purpose is to help African Americans understand that engaging an officer properly can de-escalate the situation, and possibly avoid a deadly altercation. I am a middle-aged, African American male who regrettably has had too many encounters with the police during my lifetime. I have never been arrested or beaten by a police officer, nor have I ever been disrespectful or mouthed off to one.

I do realize that if a police officer wants to use violence against you, he is going to do it, but I truly believe it’s harder to beat up a person who is polite and compliant. Try these tips the next time you have an encounter with the police. It cannot hurt and it may just save you. Remember, we cannot control a police officer’s behavior, but we can control our own.

Retired Army Sergeant Major Matthew R. Drayton is a corporate speaker, life coach, consultant, leadership expert and author of Succeeding While Black. He has also been mentoring youth for over a decade and is currently the Executive Director of Great Oak Youth Development Center, a NC-based non-profit organization that mentors at risk youth.

Visit Matt Drayton for more information.

DERRICK Interview with Motivational Mentor Ed Wisdom III

Encouragement Speaker Derrick Hayes gives a DERRICK Interview by asking 7 questions through each letter of his first name to give you an insightful perspective from other experts, entrepreneurs, celebrities and up and coming super stars.

Today’s DERRICK Interview is with Ed Wisdom, III, motivational speaker, mentor, and the founder of The Edward H. Wisdom Jr. Foundation established in 2012 in honor of his father who was murdered by an “at-risk” teen, has powered himself to the forefront with his initiatives on growth and empowerment in areas of manhood, fatherhood, youth, parenting, family and community. These initiatives include efforts in spiritual, philosophical, psychological, emotional, social, and financial development.Earlier this year, Wisdom was the keynote speaker for Black History Month at Austin Peay State University where he spoke on excellence and 2 Corinthians 8:7, “excel in everything.” Wisdom was the first African American keynote speaker at the governor’s 11^th annual Tennessee Season To Remember in 2013 to honor and remember victims of homicide. Wisdom was also guest speaker at the Citywide Trayvon Martin Walk on Capitol Hill.

Wisdom has delivered his message all over the city, at prisons, juvenile detention centers, churches, schools,universities, throughout the media, and more. He explains how “iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” to articulate to men that we have a responsibility in helping other individuals grow. Wisdom also conveys the idea that “a good man leaves behind a [legacy] for his children’s children” (Proverbs 13:22) promoting the leadership of men in powering families with gifts passed from generation to generation.

Wisdom is in Senior Management in Management Information Systems (MIS) at Vanderbilt University following his father’s, Ed Wisdom Jr., footsteps as he was the Directorof MIS at TSU. Wisdom not only followed his father in his career but in his heritage in character, integrity, and much more. Wisdom is a graduate of Tennessee State University (TSU), where he also earned his Masters’ degree in Business Administration with a concentration in Business Information Systems.

His son Erik Wisdom has followed these same footsteps earning a Bachelor’s of Business Administration in Business Information Systems at Tennessee State University, thus fulfilling the legacy good men leave behind “for their children’s children.”

Ed Wisdom III was the creator of The Gentleman’s Agreement: The Rebirth of the Black Man, held at Vanderbilt University, a discussion on Growth and Empowerment; The Rebirth Vol. II Brainwashed with author and advertising genius Tom Burrell held at Tennessee State University; Life, Love, Legacy and Leadership; The Go Further, Go Farther, Go FATHER Fatherhood Initiative at Fisk University, and much more.

Wisdom is very active in the case involving the tragic murder of his father and has been very vocal in the media, with law enforcement, politician, community organizations, and more. He is a proven leader in the community.

D is for Dream. What is your dream, goals or what have you achieved?

My goal is to help men grow spiritually, philosophically, psychologically, emotionally, socially, and financially to find their true identity.  If you take a look at 2 Corinthians 8:7, it speaks to “excelling in everything” in those areas…faith (spiritual), speech and knowledge (philosophical),…complete earnestness (psychological), the love (emotional), others (social), in order that we may become rich (financial), understanding that the word financial is a Latin word where the prefix FIN means complete, or settled up and not necessarily wealthy.  My dream is to see this through to fruition with those I directly (or even indirectly) influence in order that they have that same “cultural capital” to pass on to those they lead.

E is for Education. What is your educational background and how do you use it daily?

I have a Bachelor’s and Master’s Degree in Business Administration / Management Information Systems.  I serve as Senior Manager of Database Administration in Vanderbilt University Information Technology department.  In addition to that, I provide IT consulting services through my own company.  I am a motivational speaker as well, so my dissemination of information to help individuals make intelligent decisions comes in a couple of different forms; technology and human interaction.

R is for Resource. What resources do you bring to the table that makes you unique or stand out?

If you trace the lineage from my grandfather, Ed Sr., through to my son, I offer a compelling story for men and our responsibilities as it relates to life, love, legacy, and leadership and how each of us have overachieved in those areas through building good names, character and integrity.  Each of us of was resilient, each with different sets of adversity.  My grandfather’s father died when he was 7, his mother when he was 17, and he had nothing more than a 7th grade education, however he traveled the world by sea 5 times over; raised 8 children (6 boys) who were college educated and/or decorated military veterans; and built a trucking business on good character.  My father during a time of racial divide was close lifelong friends with Olympic great Wilma Rudolph, a decorated paratrooper of the 82nd Airborne Parachute Infantry and the all-black 555th Airborne Parachute Battalion (Tripe Nickles), the 1st African American to teach at Clarksville High School in Clarksville, TN after integration, was 1 of 2 of the first African Americans to work in IBMs top secret security clearance facility in Atlantic City, NJ, and went on to become the Director of MIS at Tennessee State University for nearly 40 years.  Myself, I followed my father’s footsteps in Information Systems and after his tragic murder in 2011, I formed a foundation in his name to share with men ideas on legacy and leadership.  My son, followed in Information Systems and Technology as well and was raised in my household, a single parent household, and has risen in excellence.  All of this combined forms a unique story that I share with men on how to manifest through identities.

R is for Ready. When did you realize you were ready for what you are doing now?

When my son was born, I felt my father had equipped me with everything in life to be a good man, a great leader, and do great things, and fatherhood would be my change to prove it.  It catapulted me into a role that was greater than just heading my own household but in leading young boys and men connected to my son who lacked male leadership at home.  When my father was murdered I was certain that my purpose was to do exactly what I had been doing and was to continue demonstrating to men through my actions and also my words as a motivational speaker as to exactly what it took to become a real man.

I is for Individual. Name at least one individual in your network that others should learn more about and why?

Uchendi Nwani.  He has a very intriguing story about his fall, then rise to becoming a respected leader and entrepreneur.  We grew up together in the same church where his stepfather was the Pastor. We went to high school together, and have been friends for years. Uchendi is the Author of “The Millionaire Barber Stylist” and the owner of International Barber and Style which is largest barber college in the United States.

C is for Challenges. What challenges have you had to overcome?

The adversity through the murder of my father, my hero, in late 2011 has been and is my greatest challenge.  I believe I have taken it on with resilience and have ensured that the works that he began continue in the likeness of his good name.  I am still engulfed deeply in the continued investigation into my father’s murder and I am strengthened each day by my purpose to lead my family through this to and get back to more peaceful days.

K is for Key. What keys to success can you leave for upcoming entrepreneurs and leaders?

Success comes in building a good name, character and integrity and understanding that success is less about accomplishments and more about the manifestation of your identity as a visionary, a leader, and an overachiever.  Success is also understanding that good leadership is not about you as much as it is about them, those who follow.  Your goal is to develop those who follow you, making them leaders, some of whom are equipped to pass your vision on to in order to keep your vision alive.

Visit Ed Wisdom III for more information.

The DAILY (Derricknyms, Apps and Ideas to Lift You) Message for Thursday

Encouragement Speaker Derrick Hayes brings you The DAILY Message on Thursday August 8th, 2013 to empower and inspire you to your next level.

(Please read and Like, Share, Retweet or Reblog The DAILY Message)

In This Issue:

1. The Daily Derricknym is AGAIN. Do It AGAIN (Always Giving Assures Increase Now).

2. Today’s word is Rise.  When you fall do you want to get back up? Any time you fail you are only four letters away from moving in the right direction. When you stumble open your eyes and rise. This is brought to you by Motivation Your Mobile and you can download Today’s word to your Android or I Phone.

3. Idea for today is to choose your dream and use your skills.

Derrick Hayes, an alumnus of Tennessee State University provides you with The DAILY Message and is  available for small and large meetings, church events, academic speaking engagements and workshops. Please visit Derrick’s website at http://www.DerrickHayes.com  and to book him for a speaking engagement or media event, send an email to info@DerrickHayes.com  or call (706) 615-1662.

The DAILY (Derricknyms, Apps and Ideas to Lift You) Message for Wednesday

Encouragement Speaker Derrick Hayes brings you The DAILY Message on Wednesday June 5th, 2013 to empower and inspire you to your next level.

(Please read and Like, Share, Retweet or Reblog The DAILY Message)

In This Issue:

1. Daily Derricknym is GLOW. I see you have GLOW (Growth Leading Our World). Now you can also order your name as a Personalized Derricknym.

2. Today’s word is Hook. In business and life you will hear about a sales pitch. Do you have a hook and ladder? When you fish for opportunities is there any bait at the end of your hook that others will want to hold on to? This is brought to you by Motivation To Your Mobile and you can download Today’s word to your Android or I Phone.

3. Idea for today is to think positive even around the negative.

Derrick Hayes, an alumnus of Tennessee State University is available for small and large meetings, church events, academic speaking engagements and workshops. Please visit Derrick’s website at http://www.DerrickHayes.com  and to book him for a speaking engagement or media event, send an email to info@DerrickHayes.com  or call (706) 615-1662.

The DAILY (Derricknyms, Apps and Ideas to Lift You) Message for Friday

Encouragement Speaker Derrick Hayes brings you The DAILY Message to empower and inspire you to your next level.

In This Issue:

1. Daily Derricknym is MIDDLE. Rise From The MIDDLE (Moving In Discipline Develops Leadership Excellence). Now you can also order your name as a Personalized Derricknym.

2. Today’s word is Label. A few years ago the government made companies use labels so that consumers would know what was inside each product. People label each other without taking time to get to know them so they will know inside what they are all about. This is brought to you by Motivation To Your Mobile and you can download Today’s word to your Android or I Phone.

3. Idea for today is to prepare so your mind will be unstuck from waiting on luck.

(Please read and Like, Share, Retweet or Reblog The DAILY Message)

Derrick Hayes, an alumnus of Tennessee State University is available for small and large meetings, church events, academic speaking engagements and workshops. Please visit Derrick’s website at http://www.DerrickHayes.com  and to book him for a speaking engagement or media event, send an email to info@DerrickHayes.com  or call (706) 615-1662.

DERRICK Interview with Hip Hop Gospel Artist PG-13

Encouragement Speaker Derrick Hayes gives a DERRICK Interview by asking 7 questions through each letter of his first name to give you an insightful perspective from other experts, entrepreneurs, celebrities and up and coming super stars.

Today’s DERRICK Interview is with PG-13 born Delontaye Taylor who is a Christian artist that has a heart for God’s people. His desire is 2 win souls for Jesus Christ & allow lives 2 be changed through music!

Born and raised in Norfolk, Virginia, God decided to move him and his family (lovely wife Amanda and 3 handsome boys) to Columbus, Georgia. PG-13 has a passion for the youth and they cling on to him like a magnet. At the age of 23, he started with a group called Collaborated Minds, where they put out 3 mix tapes (Taking Back Our Streets Volume 1, 2, and 3) and a high impacted album in 2010, called “What’s Cooking.” After a successful album and 3 mix tapes in the streets, God spoke to PG-13 and guided him in the direction of Street evangelizing.

In February of 2012, God gave him the vision to record his 1st solo album called “LEGO”(Less Evil Greater Overflow). It was released on August 18, 2012. He released his 1st hit single called “Going Home” featuring Dunbar, which video has shot to the top of the charts on a variety of Social Networking sites in such a short period of time. His 2nd single released was “Christ on Swag.” This is a song that ministers to the youth about sagging their pants, and embarrassing themselves. To hear his music, check him out on Reverbnation, Soundcloud, or Youtube.

DERRICK Interview with Columbus Georgia Mayor Teresa Tomlinson

Encouragement Speaker Derrick Hayes gives a DERRICK Interview by asking 7 questions through each letter of his first name to give you an insightful perspective from other experts, entrepreneurs, celebrities and up and coming super stars.

Today’s DERRICK Interview is with Mayor Teresa Tomlinson who was elected as the 69th Mayor of Columbus, Georgia on November 30, 2010 with 68% of the vote. On January 3, 2011, she was sworn in as the city’s first female mayor. During her time as Mayor, Tomlinson has successfully taken on issues ranging from comprehensive Employee Pension Plan Reform to reforming the Muscogee County Prison after prior mismanagement.

For 16 years she practiced with the law firm of Pope, McGlamry, Kilpatrick, Morrison and Norwood, LLC, where she specialized in complex litigation and was the firm’s only female partner. She served from 2006-2010 as Executive Director of MidTown, Inc., a non-profit community renewal organization. She is a 1983 graduate of Chamblee High School in Atlanta, Georgia, a 1987 graduate of Sweet Briar College, in Virginia, and a 1991 graduate of Emory University School of Law, in Atlanta. Mayor Teresa Tomlinson moved to Columbus in 1994 from Atlanta and married Wade H. (Trip) Tomlinson, who was raised in Columbus.

Listen to our Exclusive DERRICK Interview below or for more information visit the City of Columbus, Ga.

DERRICK Interview with America’s #1 Leadership Life Trainer Dr. Will Moreland

Encouragement Speaker Derrick Hayes gives a DERRICK Interview by asking 7 questions through each letter of his first name to give you an insightful perspective from other experts, entrepreneurs, celebrities and up and coming super stars.

Today’s DERRICK Interview is with Dr. Will who is one of the top speakers under 40 in America. Known as America’s #1 Leadership Life Trainer, he is committed to helping individuals, organizations and companies release their Genius Potential. A respected leadership expert, keynote speaker and author, Dr. Will is living a life to leave a legacy.

 D is for Dream. What is your dream, goals or what have you achieved?

I have many dreams that formalize into one big dream of helping people “LIVE GENIUS.” This means that you are “Living In Victory Everyday, while Getting ENgaged In Unique Significance™.” So my entire life is dedicated to helping people achieve the Genius Life. I have been blessed and fortunate to wake up each morning and truly do what I love. My efforts have been recognized by others which has led to receiving a few accolades over the years. But my main motivation is always to serve others and release my God giving Genius Potential.

E is for Encourage. What encourages you?

I am encouraged by so many things, my family and friends. The opportunity to reach more people with information I feel will transform their lives. I’m encouraged by believing the world is becoming a better place. The more technology allows us to connect around the world, the more we will understand we are all the same running in the same race called life. Being surrounded by love each day encourages me.

R is for Resource. What resources do you bring to the table that makes you unique or stand out?

My experiences in life would have to be my greatest resources I believe. My journey started in Compton, California, raised by a single mother in what was at the time classified as the worse city in America. I have had the great pleasure to travel to over 25 countries on four different continents to teach and train leaders. I served my country for 8 years in the United States Army and lived in Europe for 14 years. Along with every test, trial and tribulation I have been graced to overcome, coupled with my relentless pursuit to Live Genius gives me a unique perspective on life and leadership.

R is for Ready. When did you realize you were ready for what you are doing now?

For as long as I can remember I knew I would be doing something in the arena of speaking. I didn’t know if I was going to be a lawyer, teacher or preacher, but I knew I would be up talking. But on my first trip to Ghana, West Africa is when it really hit me that this was my Genius Potential. When the audience responded to my presentation with a standing ovation, I knew that my principles and philosophy were universal concepts that I could share around the world.

I is for Individual. Name at least one person that you know that you feel others should learn about and why?

This is a tough question for me; so many great people are coming to mind. At the end of the day I have to choose the person that has had the greatest impact on my life. That person would have to be Jesus. I would suggest that you study his life, not for any religious reasons, but for how he was able to take an idea, mobilize a team, build an organization and market his message to the masses. A message that is still being spread 2000 years later. He was a phenomenal leader, motivator, teacher, business person and family man.  Whether you agree with his claim or not, you cannot deny his success and influence around the world.

C is for Continue. When you fail, things look bleak or are not optimistic what makes you want to continue?

I have to refer back to all my experiences that I have overcome all ready. One of my mentors always reminds me to stop and ask the following question; “Is anyone dead?” If no one is dead, then it is not that bad and you have the ability to think your way out and the people to help assist you if you want it. I have learned that failure is not final, just an opportunity to learn and grow and do something better the second, third or fourth time around.

K is for Key. What keys to success can you leave for upcoming entrepreneurs and leaders?

I would offer this advice to remember that success is only the starting point, not the finishing point. You want to live a life of significance; success opens the door of opportunity that leads to doing significant things in life. I have many mentors that help me keep success in its right place, it’s temporary, but significance is what leads to your legacy and that’s what we all should endeavor to do, live a life that leaves a legacy. So here are the keys:

1. Have F.O.C.U.S= Fixed On Continued Unique Service

2. Be G.E.N.U.I.S = Get ENgaged In Unique Significance

3. Practice M.S.I.D= Make Small Improvements Daily

Is there anything that we did not touch on that you would like to inspire others with?

Derrick these were some great questions, I would like to thank you for the opportunity to share with your family of supporters. I would only add that I would encourage everyone to go after that big goal, dream and desire that they may have. Don’t be afraid to fail, you will only gain from failing and be closer to accomplishing what you want in life. Don’t be afraid to LIVE GENIUS!!!

Contact Information: To have Dr. Will speak at your event, conduct team training or work with him one on one, please send an email to: Email: info@willmoreland.com 

Website: www.willmoreland.com

Connect with Dr. Will

Facebook: www.facebook.com/drwillspeaks

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MOLDLegacy

Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/drwillmoreland/

The DAILY (Derricknyms, Apps and Ideas to Lift You) Message for Friday

Encouragement Speaker Derrick Hayes brings you The DAILY Message to empower and inspire you to your next level.

In This Issue:

1. Daily Derricknym is FIRE. Your FIRE (Focus Instills Ready Excellence) Should Raise The Roof.  You can also order your name as a Personalized Derricknym.

2. Today’s word is Leader. When it is time for others to be in the game don’t do things to tarnish your name. When you don’t like what they bring to the table ask for the opportunity. Making others better will make you better. This is brought to you by Motivation To Your Mobile and you can download Today’s word to your Android or I Phone.

3. Idea for today is to think how you can make history all year around and not just in Black History month.

(Please read and Like, Share, Retweet or Reblog The DAILY Message)

Derrick Hayes, an alumnus of Tennessee State University is available for small and large meetings, church events, academic speaking engagements and workshops. Please visit Derrick’s website at http://www.DerrickHayes.com  and to book him for a speaking engagement or media event, send an email to info@DerrickHayes.com  or call (706) 615-1662.

DERRICK Interview with Networking Expert Mechelle Tucker

Encouragement Speaker Derrick Hayes gives a DERRICK Interview by asking 7 questions through each letter of his first name to give you an insightful perspective from other experts, entrepreneurs, celebrities and up and coming super stars.

Today’s DERRICK Interview is with Mechelle Tucker, p/k/a “The Networker’s Networker” is a creative authority in power networking because of who she knows, and has become a sought after business leader in the marketplace. Mechelle is an effective networker and has been practicing the art of networking for over 7 years. Power Networking is a SKILLED ART, not an activity for Mechelle.

D is for Dream. What is your dream, goals or what have you achieved?

My Dream is to collaborate and work with Oprah, Beyonce and Michelle Obama, 3 women I passionately admire. My goal is to business network with 1 million people.

E is for Encourage. What encourages you?

People who make the impossible possible always keep me encouraged.

R is for Resource. What resources do you bring to the table that makes you unique or stand out?

I have numerous affiliations with working with mover’s and shaker’s of the economy and community based organizations as a power business broker who has represented size-able incomes for all clients.

R is for Ready. When did you realize you were ready for what you are doing now?

When my 3rd party relationships started to benefit and/or profit off of my labor of introduction, connections and advice.

I is for Individual. Name at least one person that you know that you feel others should learn about and why?

Dr. Will Moreland, Author and America’s #1 Leadership Life Trainer. In 2012 I was mentioned in Dr. Will’s newest book “Genius Potential”, where he lays out the keys to lasting fulfillment in life, it’s discovering your special gift, your Genius Potential

C is for Continue. When you fail, things look bleak or are not optimistic what makes you want to continue?

My Faith is everything. My family is my biggest inspiration. My passion for networking is why I can’t stop, I won’t stop until I am over the top.

K is for Key. What keys to success can you leave for upcoming entrepreneurs and leaders?

The 7 Keys to Sail to Success: Entrepreneurship, Leadership, Relationship, Championship, Partnership, Mentorship and Membership.

Is there anything that we did not touch on that you would like to inspire others with?

I want all entrepreneurs to know that it’s possible to have your heart desires. Never allow your actions to get desperate because only inspired actions make a positive difference.

Visit Mechelle Tucker for more information.